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All Seasons and What They Mean in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist

Pollen Season in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist
Screenshot via Northway Games

As you play through I was a Teenage Exocolonist, you’ll likely notice a few things right off the bat: there are many things Vertumna has in common with Earth, and many more things that it absolutely does not; strangely, the seasons on Vertumna sit somewhere in the middle between these two extremes. Some aspects of the seasons on Vertumna are very similar to those of Earth’s, like the fact that there are four major seasons in a year. Each of these four major seasons (excluding Glow) has a length of approximately three months, similar to the seasons of Earth.

Unlike Earth, however, Vertumna has thirteen months in a year, rather than Earth’s twelve. That extra month makes room for Glow season, a season unlike almost anything ever seen on Earth! Each season has its its pros and cons, though Glow season’s cons definitely outweigh those of the other four seasons. These five seasons are all very different, and some are almost completely dissimilar from Earth’s seasons. Keep reading to discover all of the seasons in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist and what they mean!

All Seasons in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist

Quiet Season

Quiet Season in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist
Screenshot via Northway Games

Quiet season is the first season you will encounter in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist, and it’s most similar to Winter on Earth. Quiet is one of the coldest seasons in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist, the environment during Quiet becomes much more frigid, and a thick layer of snow covers everything the sunlight touches. The snow on Vertumna isn’t like the snow on Earth, however. This snow is slightly acidic, though not acidic enough to harm anyone it comes into contact with.

The snow on Vertumna also sparks when you run through it! It’s never really explained why it does this, though it’s possible that since it’s dryer and warmer than the snow on Earth, it’s capable of holding a slight electric charge. Similar to the snow on Earth, you can also build small structures with the strange snow on Vertumna, such as “snow buddies”. Also, according to Tangent, the snow of Quiet tastes “slightly sour”. Quiet is also the season in which your character’s birthday resides, in Mid Quiet!

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Pollen Season

Pollen Season in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist
Screenshot via Northway Games

Pollen season is the second season in Vertumna’s cycle, coming directly after the third month of Quiet (Late Quiet). Pollen is most similar to Spring on Earth, though much more extreme. On Earth, Spring can bring a lot of nearly invisible air-born pollen; on Vertumna, the pollen is so thick you can see it, like a dense pink fog you can barely see through. Similar to Earth’s pollen, however, only a small percentage of people are allergic to the pollen on Vertumna.

Not everyone is terribly affected by it, though the people that are affected by thick pink pollen are in serious trouble. Those who are allergic to Earth’s pollen will normally experience symptoms similar to the common cold; those who are allergic to the pollen on Vertumna will slowly deteriorate while the pollen grows deadly fungus inside their body. After enough seasons, anyone severely affected by the pollen will have their body turned into fungus-food; this sickness caused by Vertumna’s pink pollen is called the Shimmer, and cures for this deadly illness are incredibly difficult to produce.

Dust Season

Dust Season in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist
Screenshot via Northway Games

Dust season is the third major season in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist, coming right after the last month of Pollen. Dust is most similar to Summer on Earth, and there are much fewer dissimilarities to Earth’s correlative season than the other seasons of Vertumna. Dust is the hottest season in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist, and is the second least-rainiest season, right after Quiet.

Dust is more similar to summer than any other season, though it’s more like Summer and Autumn combined. Dust is the season of heat on Vertumna, but it’s also the season of harvest! After the first month of Dust (Early Dust), all the cultivated crops are harvested, resulting in a colony-wide festival during Mid Dust. This means that Mid Dust would be most similar to late August or early September on Earth.

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Wet Season

Wet Season in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist
Screenshot via Northway Games

This season is aptly named Wet season, on account of the increased rainfall this season brings. This season brings a lot more rain, a lot more clouds, and a lot less sunshine; Wet season is most like very late Fall on Earth. You know the time period between late Fall and early Winter where everyone is just inexplicably darker, colder, and a lot more wet? That is what the entire Wet season of Vertumna is like.

Although Wet season is one of the wettest seasons in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist, increased rainfall isn’t the only thing Wet season brings. Along with the numerous cold rainstorms that brutally batter the plains of Vertumna, Wet season bring heaps of sickening anticipation for the colony. Wet season, like the previous three seasons, is three months long. After the third month of Wet is over (Late Wet), a strange new season makes its unwelcome appearance; Wet season serves only as a prelude to Vertumna’s most sinister season of all.

Glow Season

Glow in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist
Screenshot via Northway Games

Glow season may look pretty, but it’s one of the most dangerous seasons in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist. This season is unlike anything on Earth, and (thankfully) only lasts a single month. During Glow, there is no sunshine, meaning the entire colony is shrouded in Vertumna’s natural inky blackness for an entire month. The reason this season is called Glow despite the lack of sunlight, is because Vertumna’s native flora and mega mushrooms begin to exhibit a bizarre form of bioluminescence. This process may look glamorous, but it only serves as a disguise for this season’s true sinister purpose.

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During Glow, no one is allowed outside the gates of the colony. Some colonists will even refuse to go outside at all during this month, on account of the massive danger this season brings. During Glow season, all of Vertumna’s fauna becomes inordinately agitated, and will stop at nothing to break into the colony’s gates to destroy it from the inside. Anyone unlucky enough to be outside when this yearly attack happens will either fight and barely make it out alive, or not make it out alive at all. Nearly 100% of deaths in I Was a Teenage Exocolonist happen during this month, so make sure your Bravery Skill is high enough to defend your colony against this savage attack every year.

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Seasons on Vertumna each have their pros and cons, though no one can deny their glaring dissimilarities to the seasons of Earth. Earth has its fair share of dangerous seasons, but they’re nothing like the downright brutal seasons of Vertumna.

Each season can affect your expeditions beyond the gates in small ways as well; during Quiet, you can make “snow buddies” in the snow, and in Pollen, you can make gruesome discoveries involving animals that were taken over by the Shimmer. There are also more animals that can be found in the wild during Pollen and Dust, so it’s best to go out during these months if you’re trying to level up your Animals Skill.

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